before my internet crashes again...

first off, let me thank Frontier Communications for absolutely nothing. i just love when a tech tells you "well, we're going to try this but I don't think it will do anything." what a piece of shit company.

so i'm trying to type as fast as i can to get this fucker posted before the internet vanishes into thin air like this morning. nothing quite like waiting 30 minutes for 1 email to open. high speed internet for sure.

but, in my anger last night over the situation, i did crank out 3 poems. not quite sure why i'm writing in groups of 3 at the moment, but oh well. i typed them up earlier today and like them. i'm figuring an early July submission on those.

i did watch the guy walk across the Grand Canyon last night. i laughed when he prayed nearly 3/4 of the whole way across. i looked at my mother and said if he falls, atheists will have all the ammunition they will ever need. pretty ballsy doing the stunt in jeans.

tonight will be a mix of game 6 of the Stanley Cup Final and Monday Night Raw. both should be pretty damn good.

we might have got almost 2 minutes of drizzle today. not exactly what i was hoping for. we need a good decent rainfall, and quickly. these hot, dry days are surely using up all the water from the spring. other than that, the crops look about 100000000000000000000% better than last year at this time.

i take my truck in tomorrow and have a deposit to make at the bank. i guess the bank is going to have to wait.

a quick shout out to the muse. if you happen to read this you'll understand why i haven't returned your call yet. i do hope you are doing well.

peace and chicken grease.

music today:

Hayes Carll - KMAG YOYO (& other American stories)
Brandi Carlile - Live at Bear Creek EP
Yellow Red Sparks - Simply Put Me In Your Place EP
JD McPherson - Signs & Signifiers
Van Halen - Van Halen II

"You can't wait for inspiration. You have to go after it with a club." - Jack London

if the clouds ever do break

hopefully, at least i think so, most or all the crops got planted last night before the rain started. it's been a steady drizzle on and off for about 10 hours now. that does wonders for my bad mood and bad back. joy.

mom's mother's day gift came in the mail today. i was fearing it was going to be next Monday with what amazon.com was telling me. i'm pretty sure she won't see this one coming at all.

i spent the majority of last night and this morning fucking around with my YouTube channel. i think i finally have it the way i want it. now, i just need to get cracking on ideas for videos for my book. if anyone does any animation or music and would be interested in doing something, please drop me a line either here on the blog or email me. all my contact info is on the side of the blog. i think i'm going to do something with all the pictures i've been taking... just need to find the right poem in the book for it.

a huge night in just about everything i'm interested in. the New York Rangers play a MUST WIN game 3 tonight at home. that starts at 7:30 pm. the NBA playoffs start back up tonight at 7 pm. the live episodes of The Voice start tonight at 8 pm. as does Monday Night Raw. i've already figured out i'm going to try to catch The Big C on the west coast feed of Showtime at 1 am. thank god the Yankees are off tonight. it's going to be damn near impossible to fit all of this in as it is. now anyone can see why i say i don't watch commercials.

i really did enjoy the Sunday night shows last night. Vice is really start to grow on me.

if i don't beat myself up too bad this evening, i will hopefully have a little more in depth post tomorrow. hopefully describing a Rangers win, a skunk who is gone and no longer eating the cat food, 2 returning cats that have been gone for almost a month (little chance of that happening but why not shoot for the stars) and a truck that has magically started running better.

music today:

Social Distortion - Somewhere Between Heaven And Hell
Nine Inch Nails - Pretty Hate Machine

"Being entirely honest with oneself is a good exercise." - Sigmund Freud


i will now leave you with a song i heard on the radio a few weeks ago and it is still stuck in my head

good morning depression

when a stunning Yankee bottom of the 9th comeback becomes watching the captain carried off the field with a fractured ankle, say hello to my old friend depression. the swings of emotion last night were gut wrenching. i live and die with this shit. it should not come to a surprise to anyone when i'm dead in my mid 50's.

not really in the mood for sports today but it's Sunday. i've already picked up the trash and i have no desire at all to clean old antiques. so football it is. i have no confidence in my fantasy teams today. i have shitty choices all over the place.

keep in mind that my personal mantra since i was 5 has been aim low and accept when you outdo your own negativity. it's worked out ok so far in my life. i think it would probably take a lobotomy for me to have a positive view of life.

i imagine i will flip over to the Yankees sometime in my football viewing to see how bad it is. i haven't watched a Yankee playoff game without Derek Jeter since i was very young. early 1980's young. fuck i feel old at the moment.

all the crops are off as of last night. but, of course, the wind today is out of the south and blowing all the shit from the harvested fields up to the house. i may just be a power outage away from deciding it's time for the madness to take over.

fingers crossed.

music today:

Of Monsters And Men - My Head is an Animal
TV on the Radio - Nine Types of Light

"Listen; there's a hell of a good universe next door: let's go." - e.e. cummings

a foggy, rainy day

i suppose this is a great day to be a duck. no sun, off and on rain, fog, just a fucking blah day. so i settled down to watch Manchester United and hopefully see something good. 15 minutes in and i'm sitting in a ah, fuck me, why do i bother type of stance in my chair. really, i was just hoping for something. thankfully, it was another wake-up call. Rooney and RvP to the rescue. 1 lucky goal and another that was pure fucking brilliance from both of them. the best thing that came today other than the 3 points was Sir Alex may have found the replacement for Scholes. and that man is none other than Wayne Rooney. He was fucking great today. i'm hoping they play him in that role for the rest of the season so both he and RvP can play together all the time. notice i didn't bitch about the defense. it sucks. but, nothing will get better until the injured can come back. so, it's all about winning ugly and knowing the shit goal is going to happen. i hate it, but that's not going to change a fucking thing. i believe some people call that maturing. i call it blood pressure.

could be a good night for the Yankees. repeat the drubbing of Boston from last night and hopefully Baltimore slips up again and hello division title. i don't think the playoff mess will be decided until the last night of the season. and welcome back to Tex. please, stop getting injured.

nothing much else going on. always love when it's raining and the crops haven't been taken off. just piling on shit after a summer of fuck. hello insurance claim.

i highly recommend the 3 EP's that are listed in the music today section below. you can find all 3 of them at noisetrade.com.

tomorrow will be a typing day. hopefully tonight will be a writing night. or, tomorrow will be a short typing day.

music today:

Joe Bonamassa - Driving Towards The Daylight
Grant-Lee Phillips - Green Corn Songs: Live at McCabes
Escondido - Escondido EP
Matthew Sweet - Acoustic & Live NoiseTrade Sampler

"Somewhere, something incredible is waiting to be known." - Carl Sagan

labor day

fresh from the shower. tried my best to get the stink of yet another Yankee loss off of me. my favorite kind of loss too. fall behind, take the lead, give up that lead immediately and then lose late on a couple of broken bat hits. fucking lovely. division lead is down to 1. if they keep fucking around they will soon be out of the wild card race as well. might be time for a human sacrifice...

had a good breakfast this morning with my mother. in public even. quite the shock for her when i said yes. drove around in the rain and saw a few accidents. figured that was as good a start to the day as i could have. thankfully, didn't wake up this morning with the pain in my left leg. a complete fucking relief there my friends. as for rainfall, i'm guessing we were well over an inch of it, probably closer to 2. much needed. there's more in the forecast. i know the crops for this year are a lost cause, but next year can still be saved if we have a wet fall and winter. fingers are crossed.

hope everyone had a good labor day. did something productive on their day off or at least told the world to fuck off for a few hours. i'm hoping Monday Night Raw is entertaining enough to rescue my holiday.

i should be sending out some poems in the next week or so. probably after the first week of the NFL is over with. must have my priorities in order. when i start making more money on poetry than i do with sports, that will change. hopefully before i'm dead.

music today:

Ted Hawkins - The Next Hundred Years
Ani DiFranco - Up Up Up Up Up Up
Morphine - Like Swimming

"When something happens, we always say it happens for a reason." - Michael Clarke Duncan

embrace the insanity

just got done typing up the five poems i wrote last night. not quite sure what i think of them or where they will end up going. hopefully i have another writing outburst in me for the weekend. if a few certain things happen, it may be more than an outburst. time shall tell.

hopefully the Yankees take the Red Sox out behind the barn this weekend and put them out of their misery.

RvP is officially on Manchester United now. their revenge on the world tour begins this Monday. if he and the rest of the team can stay healthy, i will have some fun watching them run up the score on nearly everyone they play. if the injuries from last year crop up again... let's just say it won't be pretty.

the weather is supposed to have a touch of fall in the air this weekend. i'm at the point of who the fuck knows anymore. hard to be happy with the weather when i can look out the window and see dying crops. not fun at all.

other than some sports and writing, not really sure what my weekend plans are. maybe a trip over to the other home to clean some more shit out. maybe i'll get bored enough to go to the movies. or maybe i'll just sit in my room and listen to some old music. your guess is as good as mine.

music today:

Warren Haynes Band - Live at the Moody Theater
Jeff Buckley - Mystery White Boy
Oasis - Definitely Maybe
Terence Trent D'Arby - Introducing the Hardline According to Terence Trent D'Arby

"A part of kindness consists in loving people more than they deserve." - Joseph Joubert



FREE PUSSY RIOT

have i mentioned it doesn't rain anymore...

yet another day in the 90's. another fucking heatwave right around the corner. i would love for it to rain. not for the crops, as they are well past being saved, but for the grass. i actually want to be mowing grass and not just weeds. and i'm not one of these assholes out here who continue to mow their lawns each week even though we haven't had a good rain in several months. fucking stupid.

the one thing i didn't think about in this drought until i read it in the paper, the marijuana crop is down this year as well. so, here's a big FUCK YOU to mother nature.

got the rough copy of my book "Sofisticated White Trash" in the mail today. my first full length collection and quite frankly, it's fucking spectacular. can't wait for when it's unleashed upon the world.

was a little shocked with Big Brother last night. not that the coaches were coming into the game, i knew that as soon as i saw who the coaches were, but the whole no evictions and reset of the game was a bit unexpected. i know, i spend way too much time thinking about this shit. it's one of the few guilty pleasures i allow myself.

speaking of last night, i don't know what i laughed at harder. Wilfred ejaculating on Ryan or strippers crying to a song from Night Ranger or a kid filling up a bathtub with diarrhea. i have to hand it to FX. i was in tears nearly the entire hour. fucking great.

Yankees are back in action tonight. hopefully a win streak is in the near future. i might squeeze in a bit of Olympic action tonight but i think most of the night will be devoted to taking the fine tooth comb to the rough copy of my book. a tad bit anal i am.

music today:

Gary Clark Jr. - The Bright Lights EP
Charles Bradley - No Time For Dreaming
Radiohead - The Bends
Jamey Johnson - That Lonesome Song

"Inside every cynical person, there is a disappointed idealist." - George Carlin

leftovers

just a couple of nuggets that i didn't write about last night as i was busy falling asleep.

i totally enjoyed the 1000th episode of Monday Night Raw. i'm always up for a bit of nostalgia in something that i've watched for 35 of the 36 years i've been on this planet. what i liked the most was the return of the evil CM Punk. seeing him stand over The Rock and John Cena near the end of the episode made me very happy. as i said aloud to no one as i was watching, that's what you call passing the torch. i'm hoping the writers see it the way i do.

if anyone is interested to some links to my poetry that maybe aren't on this blog, please check out http://sites.google.com/site/losersincsite/.

got some decent rain this morning. wasn't so hard that it beat up what's left of the crops but was hard enough to hopefully penetrate the ground. at least that's what i'm hoping.

a hello to my friend in California. i hope you are doing well.

really looking forward to the season finale of Deadliest Catch tonight. one of my favorite shows of all time.

and after that is over, here's hoping the Yankees can make it two in a row. Sweaty Freddy against King Felix, so i'm not counting on much. maybe Ichiro knows some secrets. hopefully.

music today:

Grouplove - Never Trust a Happy Song
Fun. - Some Nights
TV on the Radio - Nine Types of Light
Ben Harper - The Will to Live

"It is my ambition to say in ten sentences what others say in a whole book." - Friedrich Nietzsche

Sunday frustration and a little bit of good news

when you have two good/sometimes great pitchers facing each other, a novice would expect a well pitched game. I've been watching baseball for nearly all of my 36 years on this planet, and things in that sport rarely if ever go according to plan. Angels win the beer league softball game 10-8. I'm happy the Yankees gave themselves a chance in the bottom of the 9th, more on that in a bit. what pissed me off was the absolutely horrific base running, Russell Martin bunting twice!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! for no fucking reason, once into a fucking double play. bad, bad relief pitching which lead to tack on runs, or the difference in the game. enter the bottom of the 9th down by 5 and score 3, have the bases loaded and have the guy who is tied for the most grand slams in history at the plate. great drama and all i can expect as an unreasonable fan is the team to give themselves a chance to win. and what does A-Rod do? of course, pop up to first base. i have never seen a great player get so fucking scared of being great in moments that actually matter. it's unreal. at least the bats are going good seeing that 3 days of home run derby against the Blue Jays start tomorrow.

in other news...

we got almost 5 good minutes of a steady rain this afternoon. not nearly enough considering we're probably 10 inches below where we should be for the year, but i have no choice but to take it. took a Sunday drive earlier and most of the crops in the area look like ours. not making me feel any better, but at least we're all fucked.

sold off a few cd's today. made a little money. will mostly go to covering postage i believe.

my book, Sofisticated White Trash, is really in the final stages now. it has a registered ISBN and a tentative release date of August. let the fun begin.

music:

Lucero - 1372 Overton Park
Violent Femmes - Violent Femmes

"A man who dares to waste one hour of time has not discovered the value of life." - Charles Darwin

the sun shines on a dog's ass every now and then

the Yankees got 5 innings from Sweaty Freddy and the bullpen was pretty much spotless for the next 4. go against their usual trend and get some hits with runners in scoring position (and of course 2 of those hits were home runs) and you get a tidy 5-3 win. very good to win the first 2 games of this series as Weaver pitches tomorrow for the Angels. get the sweep and that truly is icing on the fucking cake.

on a side note

got nearly 20 minutes of drizzle this morning that was almost hard enough to get the sidewalks wet. thank god the crop insurance is paid because this year has fucked in the ass written all over it. the soybeans actually look pretty good all things considered but the corn is somewhere right above shit. not good.

rarely do i give 2 quotes in a day, but i'm in a decent mood

"Those who know how to win are much more numerous than those who know how to make proper use of their victories." - Polybius

i'm back

wanted to come back to this blog and gloat after a Yankee sweep of the Red Sox but sadly they only took 3 of 4. but, anytime the Red Sox can be in last place at the All Star break, i'm a pretty happy boy.

didn't watch much of the home run derby, especially after Robinson Cano put up a big fat ZERO. no need to watch after that.

after a few days of over 100 the heatwave finally fucking broke. nearly 2 weeks of 90+ every damn day broke to only 87 today. of course, we're nearly 9 inches below where we should be for precipitation for the year so far. i get the feeling we would have been better off growing dirt this year. thank god for crop insurance i suppose. and thank god the heatwave was just about broken when the a/c decided to go out.

managed to write 4 poems over the last few days. actually think they are pretty good. want to write another batch before i think of another round of submissions. i'm also toying with the thought of entering this poetry contest i got a postcard about in the mail today.

laundry day today (Monday). also a nice trip to the bank to deposit my rebate check for my health care (thank you Mr. President).

music that sneaked into my ears:

Ana Tijoux - La Bala
Bruce Springsteen - Darkness on the Edge of Town
Tom Waits - Orphans (Brawlers, Bawlers & Bastards)

speaking of Tom Waits, great appearance on Letterman tonight. he's going to be on Jimmy Fallon Tuesday night.

"Men do not fail; they give up trying." - Elihu Root

on a humid saturday

always nice when the Yankees get some good pitching, a few home runs and a win the day after having their asses handed to them by the White Sox. i'm looking forward to old timer's day tomorrow so i can feel older than i really am.

finally got a little rain last night. of course, it came with thunder, lightning and 60 m.p.h. winds. had a nice leak in the kitchen and the power went out just for a few seconds, knock on wood. but the crops desperately needed what we got and we didn't have much damage than a few limbs. better than most in this area, some will be without power until the 4th of July. Yikes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

after hitting 102 and 99 degrees the last two days, so far today has topped out at 94. although, with the humidity it feels like 100. that could be my black t-shirt, i don't know. we're supposed to be in the 90's for the time being. like they usually are, i'm hoping the forecasts are wrong.

music for today:

Tori Amos - Boys for Pele
Big Head Todd and the Monsters - Sister Sweetly
Guided By Voices - Let's Go Eat the Factory
Lana Del Rey - Born to Die

"The whole secret of existence is to have no fear. Never fear what will become of you, depend on no one. Only the moment you reject all help are you freed." - Buddha




this was supposed to be posted about 4 1/2 hours ago but thanks again to Frontier Communications, my fucking internet was out for that time. i'm hoping there was either a horrific car accident that knocked it out or there better be a death involved. i'm just saying...

bracing for the heat

so i should be happy with the Yankees sweeping the Indians but hard to smile when CC and Andy both go on the disabled list on the same day. i guess we'll see just how deep the pool is for the time being. god willing Adam Warren will take this chance and make the most of it. my best hope though is the home runs keep coming.

how in the fuck does CR7 not take a pk for Portugal today. mind blowing right there. a snooze of a game. reinforces my belief that whoever wins between Italy and Germany will win the whole damn thing. if i was a betting man, my money is going on Germany.

supposed to get up to 100 or damn near for the next 4 days or so. that should do wonders for the crops. hopefully the a/c doesn't decide to give up in this heat. and with it being so dry and the 4th of July coming up... shouldn't be long before some dumbass burns a field down with a sparkler.

music for today:

Zac Brown Band - You Get What You Give

"Hollywood is a place where they'll pay you a thousand dollars for a kiss and fifty cents for your soul." - Marilyn Monroe

this that and some other shit

my internet has been slower than shit today or completely out, so i'm trying to write this as quickly as possible. a nice FUCK YOU to Frontier Communications for this horse shit they call high speed internet. what a waste.

got 5 poems rejected today from Black-Listed Magazine. those will go back into the factory and i think they may end up overseas.

i guess after five earned runs R.A. Dickey isn't the second coming of Walter Johnson. imagine that. hopefully the Yankees can get a nice winning streak going again.

supposed to be near 100 degrees by the end of the week. not sure how the crops are going to survive. by then the ground might as well be concrete.

best of luck to the muse on her vacation to the great northwest. stay safe and relax for a change.

with the internet pissing me off, you can imagine there was some music listened to today.

Black Sabbath - We Sold Our Soul for Rock N Roll
Disturbed - Asylum
Shrug - Everything's Blowing Up Roses
The Dandy Warhols - Come Down
The Doors - In Concert

"My choice early in life was either to be a piano-player in a whorehouse or a politician. And to tell the truth, there's hardly any difference." - Harry S. Truman

random thoughts on a cloudy day

it rained all night and most of the morning. a light drizzle for the most part. a good soaking for the crops.

as i drove into town to get the mail, i thought about how i somehow still get a rush when i get published. same rush at 36 that i got at 19. i guess i really am doing what i was meant to be doing. though, i suppose the money comes after i die.

check out my new poem "the promised land" in the June issue of Underground Voices. check out the previous post for links.

i'll soon be off to the thriving hillbilly metropolis of Richmond, Indiana to do some shopping. and no, not for fireworks and liquor like most of the people from Ohio crossing the border. though, that's not a bad idea. all i'm really hoping for is a poem or two.

wanted to start the month off proper and i think i did just that. today's musical selections:

Butch Walker & The Black Widows - The Spade
The Black Keys - El Camino
Barenaked Ladies - Rock Spectacle
Outkast - Stankonia

"Ambition is so powerful a passion in the human breast, that however high we reach we are never satisfied."  - Henry Wadsworth Longfellow