had a lovely conversation with the muse last night for about 35 minutes. the problem is the phone call lasted for 45 minutes. but let me rewind the tape here as i have some venting to do. i sent the muse a poem about her that is going to get published here in the summer, as she asked me to do. she read it and said it was a little heartbreaking. i said the truth always is. the problem she had was she never remembers me telling her that i was in love with her. i was crushed. i think i may have only told her a few hundred times over the last 10 years or so. so, after the 35 minutes of her telling me about her life on the west coast, she asks about mine. this is rare as most of our conversations are purely about her and nothing else. so i tell her about the farm, my mother, my father, etc, and the only thing she asks is how much i would be getting from the farm auction. this immediately reminded me of my father as he lived his life solely worried about money and nothing else. after a little back and forth, she asks me if she was always going to be single. i told her that once compromise enters her vocabulary, she'll be fine. and i told her i wasn't speaking about compromise in the way of you changing your morals or beliefs, but more of being tolerant of what others believe. you would have thought i called her a cunt. after she goes on and on about she tried this shit before and never again, the asshole in me had to speak up. so i told her to enjoy being single and miserable. she then calls me an asshole and tells me this is why she never believed me when i said i loved her. this quickly pissed me off as she earlier said she never could remember me telling her that. being the gentleman i am, i thanked her for wasting 45 minutes of my life and hung up on her. so, what i now ask of you, readers, fans, friends, general public, strangers, who the fuck ever... if i EVER speak of the muse again in terms that aren't poetic in nature, you have my PERMISSION to find me, put a gun in my mouth and blow my fucking brains out. i will not allow that CUNT to ruin another day of my life.
the New York Yankees lost yesterday 8-2. i wasn't surprised given the pitching matchup. they play again tonight on ESPN. i'll gladly miss most of that.
needless to say, i didn't sleep good last night. so i was really hoping Manchester United was going to change my vibe for the day. unfortunately, they made it worse. they played like absolute SHIT for the entire 90 minutes. a 3-0 loss at Everton. they are still in 4th, but they need to finish in the top 3 to avoid a playoff for the Champions League. i'm hoping this was just one of those days.
so, in my anger, i decided to put all my music in alphabetical order. nothing like have around a thousand cd's on my bed. took me 3 1/2 hours to get it all done. later this week, i'll do the same with my books. good times.
the WWE is having the Extreme Rules ppv tonight. since i have the WWE Network now, i'm planning on watching it. that means, on the DVR tonight will be Nurse Jackie, Happyish, Silicon Valley, Veep and Last Week Tonight. either the wrestling is going to be so good that i'm in a really good mood and watch a few of those shows before i go to sleep or the wrestling is going to suck and i'm going to watch them all as i'm slowly drinking myself to death.
here's a little music to change the mood:
took mom over to the farm today. she's been letting the family come over and take shit before the auction company decides what they want to auction. of course, mom forgot to make sure she got what she wanted first. i will get to listen to her bitch about this for years to come i imagine. i fed the cats while i was over there. looks like we may be down to 15 cats now. that's all i have seen the last few times over there.
i'm going to get in the shower now (enjoy that visual) and give these old bones a good soaking. i'm in pain from head to toe at the moment. these are the days where i'm certainly yearning for the relief that death will bring.
hope everyone is having a great weekend. i was able to vacuum the house and take out the trash without falling down, so life certainly must be good.
be well. be creative. be cool. be quick to send me CASH, panties, hate mail, love letters, broken promises and dirty pennies from heaven.
peace and chicken grease...
Courtney Barnett - World Cafe Session
Shinedown - Sound of Madness
Edward Sharpe & The Magnetic Zeros - 40 Day Dream
Suicidal Tendencies - You Can't Bring Me Down
The New Basement Tapes - Down on the Bottom
"I think there is a poem out there for everyone, to be an entrance into the poetry and a relationship with it." - Natasha Trethewey
and your pro wrestling video of the day: