Monday, June 11, 2018

apparently, i expect too much from humanity...

the last 12 hours of my life have been a fucking drain on me... physically, emotionally, etc. add in alcohol, 2 stubborn souls and there is bound to be tears, expletives and the ending of a friendship or two. as one of the poems i wrote today started off... never have a best friend fighting cancer and mental illness at the same time. it's exhausting.

i'm not real sure where the friendship between Debbie Kirk and i stands at the moment. apparently, i'm a bad human for not being an enabler, for calling people on their bullshit and expecting someone fighting cancer to actually appear to be fighting. and while i do understand the horrors of withdrawal, of the horrific things cancer does to the body, i also witnessed a man 10 years older than Debbie take a 3 month death sentence and turn it into 2 1/2 more years of life. and while i'm not naive enough to believe everyone should have the battle my stepfather had in them, it certainly would help. and 9 times out 10, i have no clue which Debbie i'm talking to. and quite frankly, i have enough shit on my plate to be a punching bag for someone else. so, i'm taking the quiet approach for now. i will certainly listen but i do understand quite clearly that my methods and suggestions for help aren't, so there's no need to continue that. if you would like to donate to Debbie's fund to help her battle with breast cancer, you can do so here: https://www.gofundme.com/5m0wfqg

my mother's doctor's appointment went forever today. mom forgot she had paperwork to fill out since she's on Medicare now. plus, the girl working the front desk was learning on the job. it was her first day. so, let's just say an appointment at 2:30 quickly became closer to 3:30 by the time it was all said and done.

but, i did write 16 poems while in the waiting room. i will type those up during wrestling tonight.

we had a very late lunch after mom's appointment. the waitress we had today was drop dead fucking gorgeous. sadly, math was not a strong point for her. neither was an attention for detail. but, she had the kind of eyes that would make you kill for her. there will be poems.

it's also been raining on and off all day long. arthritis is quickly becoming the reason why i will have a bad drug addiction in my late 40's.

the New York Yankees lost last night to the shitty Mets, 2-0. just one of those nights where one mistake and an offense that doesn't show up, and it's a loss. oh well. the Yankees are off tonight and start a series with Washington tomorrow night at home.

the season finale of Billions was brilliant last night. i can't wait to see what happens in season 4.

I'm Dying Up Here was very good last night.

Westworld was fucking great, as usual last night.

Succession was good last night.

Last Week Tonight was hilarious as usual.

Drop the Mic was pretty good last night.

Total Bellas was pretty good as well last night.

enjoy some music:

and now some of this and that:

on the DVR tonight will be Vice News Tonight. i'll be watching Monday Night Raw for most of the evening.

mom's mechanic called and told her not to have me bring in the car tomorrow morning, like we were supposed to. he couldn't line up a SUV for the rental while our Highlander is in the shop. they think something is wrong with the electrical for the passenger side brake lights. so, i won't have to be up early tomorrow. not like i'm going to actually get to sleep in.

happy birthday to the biggest crush i ever had in my life. i hope you are still alive and well. she stopped responding to my emails 2 years ago.

i'll be on here sometime tomorrow. i might get some poems out in the morning, who knows.

i hope everyone had a great weekend.

nunca intentes estar más loco que otra persona loca

be well. be creative. be cool. be quick to send me CASH, panties, hate mail, love letters, broken promises and dirty pennies from heaven.

peace and chicken grease...

music:

Tom Waits - House Where Nobody Lives
Leonard Cohen - Famous Blue Raincoat
Ryan Bingham - Until I'm One with You
Valerie June - Somebody To Love

"Never look at the trombones. You'll only encourage them." - Richard Strauss

and your whatever the fuck i wanted you to see video of the day:

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