nothing like getting woke up by a telemarketer...

 i know i don't sleep well, but i did enough yesterday that i was hoping to really get some sleep. between the cooking, vacuuming the house, and doing a ton of dishes, i was hoping for something close to what a normal human gets for sleep. so, roughly 4 1/2 hours into my sleep, the fucking phone rings. the phone said spam risk. fuck me. and of course, i couldn't get back to sleep. oh well.

the New Orleans Saints lost yesterday at Carolina, 22-14. too many fucking turnovers once again. they play next week in London against the Vikings. 

the Yankees won last night against the Red Sox, 2-0. the game only went 6 innings before the rain came. of course, due up next for the Yankees was Aaron Judge. but since both teams had to be in different cities today, there was no reason to wait 3 or 4 hours for the rain to end. Judge is still at 60 HR but he is back in the lead for batting average. so, the triple crown watch is back on. the Yankees play tonight at Toronto. if the Yankees win any game in this series, they will clinch the division.

the season finale of Big Brother was good last night. Monte won the final HOH and decided to take Taylor to the end with him. big mistake as Turner ended up being Monte's only vote by the jury. Taylor gave one of the best speeches EVER on Big Brother and won 8-1 with the jury vote. she also won the favorite houseguest. first time that double win has happened. so, she ended up winning $775,000 and a cruise for two.

Last Week Tonight was BRILLIANT as always.

the season finale of City on a Hill was excellent last night.

enjoy some music:

and now some of this and that:

on the DVR tonight will be The Voice and Monday Night Raw.

i might watch some of the NFL game tonight between the Giants and Cowboys.

i got some amazing artwork today from this artist on Etsy. below is a link to his store:

https://www.etsy.com/shop/chuckhodi?ref=profile_header

i did listen to episode 414 of Notsam Wrestling this morning. you can hear that by going here:

https://www.stitcher.com/show/sam-roberts-wrestling-podcast/episode/down-the-white-rabbit-hole-notsam-wrestling-414-207058963

i did take my blood pressure today, like the doctor wanted me to since it was higher on my last visit two weeks ago. today was much closer to my normal.

i should be on here tomorrow after the USMNT takes on Saudi Arabia.

i hope everyone had a great weekend.

until tomorrow kids...

fight the power.

fuck racism.

fuck hatred.

fuck war.

fuck the police.

black lives matter.

stay healthy.

wash your fucking hands.

stay off the fucking streets.

get the fucking shot.

a veces el mundo entero me pone de los nervios

be well. be creative. be cool. be quick to send me CASH, panties, hate mail, love letters, broken promises and dirty pennies from heaven.

peace and chicken grease...

music:

Violent Femmes - Add It Up (Live)

LIVt w/Dave B. - Let It Go

grentperez - Ego

Todd Snider - Alright Guy (Live)

The Allman Brothers Band - Whipping Post (Live)

"Only those who will risk going too far can possibly find out how far one can go." - T.S. Eliot

and your whatever the fuck i wanted you to see video of the day:

i guess i'm too bitter to be naive

i really have no clue why it took my uncle's family so god damn long to get him into hospice. was it that they were too fucking naive about cancer and death? were they so fucking selfish that they had to have him at home? it never made any damn sense to me, but it was never my place to say anything. so my uncle went to hospice yesterday. they cleaned him up and 10 minutes later he was dead. i figured his goal was to make it to Christmas and since he achieved that, it shouldn't be too long... the service is on Wednesday. i'm not looking forward to it. my uncle died without ever knowing what one his daughters did to me. now, i put that on my mother since she chose to not tell anyone about it. so, there's an ocean of feelings for me going into this one. i respected my mother's wishes of not telling him myself, but now i get to spend a funeral where the cousin that molested me will be just a few feet away. the stages of grief, they are all fucked up for me. i went a quarter century not being around my uncle, always thinking that my mother and father had told him why. and then to think that we moved next door to him so he could live out his final days around his sister. i have no fucking clue if we are staying here or not now. i was thinking in the car today that there's probably only 5% of me that's left that doesn't want to die. i have no fucking clue how much longer i can live for that 5%. and i know damn well Wednesday is going to be a shit show where i'm supposed to have a brave face on and not embarrass anyone or make a scene. it's not easy for me to swallow everything that has happened to me and pretend it never fucking existed in the first place. it's even harder when you know the people that are supposed to love you simply don't give a shit. and to think all i ever really wanted was for someone to say i'm sorry. nearly 35 years later, i doubt sorry fucking cuts it now. and when i've exhausted the poems about it, where the fuck do i go from there? so yeah, the funeral will be on Wednesday. i'll be highly medicated.
http://www.gilbert-fellers.com/notices/Donald-Holland

i thought The Golden Globes was pretty good last night. being a very liberal person, i enjoyed all the shots at the incoming king. i would say president, but i know better. i was really happy for Donald Glover. i thought Atlanta was a really amazing show. the two awards last night proved it.

The Affair was a bit of a holy fuck episode last night.

the football games went how i expected them to last night. next week's games should be better.

enjoy some music:

and now some of this and that:

on the DVR tonight will be Vice News Tonight. i'll be watching Monday Night Raw for most of the evening.

sure, i know Alabama is playing Clemson tonight for the national championship. if Ohio State was playing, i'd be watching. i suppose the football game will be on during commercials.

i did write 7 poems today, shocker. i certainly wasn't in the mood to type them up. maybe i'll do that later tonight.

i got the artwork i ordered from Etsy today. it's fucking awesome. here's a link to the shop:
https://www.etsy.com/shop/JamesLinckeCreations

i went to the grocery store this afternoon, mostly just to get out of the damn house. for most of the time i was in the store, i was sort of like a zombie. but then i happened to turn up an aisle and be behind this beautiful black woman wearing tight sweatpants. something about watching as ass shake that snaps you right out of being a zombie. yes, the poem is already written.

i will probably be on here tomorrow after Manchester United plays. and i will probably have some more poems written and all of them typed up (hopefully).

my mom is depressed, which i completely understand. as i wrote today, sometimes when we grow old we enter a perpetual state of grief. i'm only 40, so i don't know if there's any fucking way out of it yet.

be well. be creative. be cool. be quick to send me CASH, panties, hate mail, love letters, broken promises and dirty pennies from heaven.

peace and chicken grease...

music:

Fitz & The Tantrums - Songs for a Breakup: Volume 1 EP
St. Paul & The Broken Bones - Burning Rome
Red Wanting Blue - My Name Is Death (Live)
Tinsley Ellis - Kiss of Death

"I've never been an optimist." - Joan Baez

and your whatever the fuck i wanted you to see video of the day:

new year, same luck

so my 2017 started off with my order from Etsy getting cancelled because the item i tried to purchase was mistakenly listed as available. my credit card will be refunded. joy. so i spent the next 2 hours trying to find something like what i ordered the first time. i found something and it was half the price i was paying before. not bad. of course, the order still has to actually happen and be shipped before i'll get too giddy.

i did do a little writing last night. 3 poems full of loneliness and despair. hello 2017. i typed them up this morning and will probably send them out sometime next week.

i didn't sleep well at all last night. i think i went to bed around 3 and was back up around 5. i tried going back to sleep but that didn't work. hello insomnia, my name is...

Austin City Limits was great last night.

ROH had some never before seen on television matches last night. excellent.

team USA beat Canada 3-1 yesterday to win the group at the World Juniors. it was the first time the USA had defeated Canada on New Year's Eve since 1998. the USA will now play Switzerland tomorrow.

the New York Rangers won at Colorado last night 6-2. The King returned to the net and became the winningest European born goalie in NHL history. that was a nice, successful road trip. the boys next play Buffalo at home on Tuesday.

and then there's the Ohio State game from last night. honestly, Clemson won every aspect of the game... offense, defense, special teams, coaching, etc. i think the only thing Ohio State won last night was the battle of the bands. a 31-0 loss that didn't feel that close. the only good thing is the game left such a bad taste in the players mouths that most of them that could leave early aren't. so maybe this debacle won't happen again next year.

enjoy some music:

and now some of this and that:

on the DVR tonight will be Wishful Drinking and The Affair.

the New Orleans Saints finish their what could have been again season today at Atlanta. i figure the game will be a shootout. if the Saints win they could finish 8-8 and that's exactly why i figure they will lose.

my uncle is in the hospital again with pneumonia. it's never the cancer that kills you, it's always the other shit that does the trick.

that's all for me today kids. i'll be on here tomorrow after Manchester United plays. hopefully i'll be in a good mood.

happy new year to everyone. may your 2017 include everything and more.

be well. be creative. be cool. be quick to send me CASH, panties, hate mail, love letters, broken promises and dirty pennies from heaven.

peace and chicken grease...

music:

Prince - Let's Go Crazy
The Airborne Toxic Event - Sometime Around Midnight
The New Basement Tapes - When I Get My Hands On You

"I am a kind of paranoid in reverse. I suspect people of plotting to make me happy." - J.D. Salinger

and your whatever the fuck i wanted you to see video of the day: