before the rain comes...

 i was up at 7:30 this morning. not that i wanted to be, but... i got the bird food out this morning. i had to put air in the front tire of the Highlander. it has felt like it was going to rain since i got that shit done this morning. i figure when i get ready to go to Kroger to get my mom's prescription, that is when it will start raining.

the Yankees lost last night to Toronto, 4-0. hopefully, they will stop this losing streak this afternoon.

the New Orleans Saints lost last night at Green Bay, 20-10.

Smackdown and NXT Level Up were both really good last night.

AEW Rampage was good last night.

Real Time with Bill Maher was hilarious last night.

enjoy some music:

and now some of this and that:

nothing on the DVR tonight.

other than some baseball, i'll probably watch some soccer today.

i should be on here tomorrow in the morning, hopefully long before the Yankees retire Paul O'Neill's #21.

i hope everyone has a great Saturday.

until then kids...

fight the power.

fuck racism.

fuck hatred.

fuck war.

fuck the police.

black lives matter.

stay healthy.

wash your fucking hands.

stay off the streets.

get the fucking shot.

aquí viene el dolor

be well. be creative. be cool. be quick to send me CASH, panties, hate mail, love letters, broken promises and dirty pennies from heaven.

peace and chicken grease...

music:

Q Lazzarus - Goodbye Horses

Michelle - Sea Shanty

Jeremy Nail - Open Door

Smokey Brights- Ocean Shores

Magnolia Park - i should've listened to my friends

"I tasted freedom and I really liked it." - Phil Lynott

and your whatever the fuck i wanted you to see video of the day:

don't worry, the words will come...

i was all ready last night to write out the pain. 2 fucking hours later and nothing on the page. the younger me would have been pissed and full of panic and rage. i'm old. i simply went to bed. this morning, of course while taking a shit, the first good line of the month popped into my head. i ended up writing my first 3 poems of December today. they are really, really good. they will be included in my first submissions of the month.

i went to the bank today to make a deposit. there's a certain happiness i get when i'm the only white guy in a place and i don't feel threatened or worried. i was a little surprised how busy it was and then i remembered what day it was.

i'll be back in a bit, the last load of my laundry just got done in the dryer...

ok, i'm back...

when the New York Rangers were up 3-0 going into the 3rd period yesterday, i was pretty happy. when they ended up losing to Winnipeg in the shootout, 4-3, i was pretty pissed. much like i said yesterday, the Vic Hadfield ceremony would be the best part of the game.

the season finale of Camping was hilarious last night.

Ray Donovan was really good last night.

Enemies: The President, Justice & the FBI was about the Clinton presidency last night. i can remember sitting at a table at a friend's house telling everyone the economy was too good for him to be impeached and removed from office. i did enjoy watching all the Republicans then that wanted blood are the same ones now protecting Trump as much as possible.

Escape at Dannemora was excellent last night.

enjoy some music:

and now some of this and that:

on the DVR tonight will be Vice News Tonight, The Voice and Say Her Name: The Life and Death of Sandra Bland. i'll be watching Monday Night Raw for most of the evening, unless it fucking sucks again this week.

Ohio State didn't make the playoffs. i figured that would happen. they will play Washington in the Rose Bowl on New Year's Day. hopefully, they will get a victory.

i hope everyone had a great weekend.

i'll be on here early tomorrow since the Dayton Flyers have a home game tomorrow night. and as of right now, i think mom is going to go with me.

Y aquí viene otra mujer hermosa que quiere hablar conmigo ...

be well. be creative. be cool. be quick to send me CASH, panties, hate mail, love letters, broken promises and dirty pennies from heaven.

peace and chicken grease...

music:

Band of Horses - No One's Gonna Love You
Q Lazzarus - Goodbye Horses
Rufus - Tell Me Something Good
Morphine - French Fries With Pepper
Bruce Springsteen - I'm on Fire

"Words, as is well known, are the great foes of reality."- Joseph Conrad

and your whatever the fuck i wanted you to see video of the day:

4 in the morning, in a cold sweat...

i am somewhat used to having bad dreams. i mean, i have probably died in my dreams a couple million times i suppose. but the dream last night was different. it felt more real, more likely to fucking happen. i would guess the dream was about 10 to 15 years in the future. i know it was a dream because i was successful and happy. the writing was actually making me money and i was with a beautiful woman (the muse). i was walking down the street, back to our little utopia in some tall building in some big city, where out of nowhere i was shot in the face and killed. and it happened just like that. no warning, no slow motion... i popped out of bed like what the fuck. i got online to see if the muse happened to be awake, as she would be the only one i would want to talk to at that point. of course, 4 in the morning, most people are fucking asleep. i got back in bed and tried to calm myself. that didn't work but i eventually did go back to sleep. i think i got 3 hours or so after that. i have had this long held belief, since childhood, that happiness was something that i wasn't supposed to experience in this life. i have tried for over 30 years to try to change that. i haven't been successful. the muse is one of the few humans on this planet that makes me think such change is possible. i tend to think the dream last night was my subconscious reminding me that no matter how much i think i can change, or if change is even possible, it will be taken away in a snap of the fingers.

i did finish the mix cd i made for the muse last night. i'm going to be really interested to see what her reaction to this will be.

the New York Yankees won yesterday 5-3 over Texas. the bullpen tried to give the game away but thankfully Miguel Andujar hit a clutch homer in the 7th that was the winning runs. the Yankees can win the series this afternoon.

i took a nap after i finished the blog yesterday. i actually woke up feeling somewhat refreshed. so, after the baseball game was over yesterday, i decided to go out to the store. i found what mom and i couldn't find at Meijer finally yesterday. plus, right before i left, mom told me that Kroger had called. that meant the pills i called in must be ready. so i went there after Meijer, got my pills and a couple other things. i made it back home before dinner.  that made me feel at least productive.

ROH was excellent last night.

i did watch Henry Rollins: Keep Talking, Pal again last night. it was much better than i was expecting.

enjoy some music:

and now some of this and that:

on the DVR tonight will be Big Brother, Power, The Affair, Who is America?, Our Cartoon President, Sharp Objects, Ballers and Insecure.

i know mom has two appointments coming up this week. she's finally getting her eyes checked on Tuesday. and then on Friday, she's going to an appointment down by where she went to rehab. i'm not sure when i'm going to do the grocery shopping on Friday. but, i won't stress over that clusterfuck until it happens.

i hope everyone had a good Saturday. hopefully, your Sunday will be even better.

Moriré solo y miserable, tal como Dios quiso

be well. be creative. be cool. be quick to send me CASH, panties, hate mail, love letters, broken promises and dirty pennies from heaven.

peace and chicken grease...

music:

Q Lazzarus - Goodbye Horses
Cowboy Junkies - Powderfinger
Maria McKee - If Love Is a Red Dress (Hang Me in Rags)

"Creation is a drug I can't do without." - Cecil B. DeMille

and your whatever the fuck i wanted you to see video of the day: