these are the days i look forward to death

so i was on the computer this morning and an instant message pops up from the last woman i was in love with. she always had an amazing way to make sure i knew everything was my fault and i would never be good enough for her. she went on today talking about how she lost all respect for me because of something i said in an argument we had... fuck it had to be months or damn near a year ago. having learned my lesson, i said i'm sorry and changed the subject. but, as you can imagine, i've spent the day writing and wondering why the fuck do i have this life.

these are the days where i feel like it's inevitable i will die alone one day. stacks of books and poems and music all around me. my luck, none of my future drug addictions will kill me, it will simply be father time. an old bitter soul. of course, the way this country is going, eventually everyone is going to be required to have a gun, so i guess there's always hope.

i wrote 3 poems and typed them up this afternoon. i really like them. i also found a new place to send work to. that will probably happen either really late tonight or sometime before the damn weekend.

my first fantasy football draft went ok. i got a decent quarterback and some good wide receivers, so that should be a good base for the team this season. of course, if Drew Brees has a shitty season, i'm fucked.

i thought Smackdown was pretty good last night. their upcoming ppv looks like it is going to be a good one.

Hard Knocks was pretty damn funny last night. between the spelling bee and the one fucker not believing in dinosaurs, every cliche about football players is fucking true.

the New York Yankees won a wild ass game last night, 5-4 in 10 innings. the Yankees left a small village on base and went a ridiculous 2 for 16 with runners in scoring position. somehow, two shakier than shit relievers got out of a bases loaded jam in the bottom of the 10th to win the game. hopefully they can get the series win tonight.

enjoy some music:

and now some of this and that:

on the DVR tonight will be Big Brother, Tyrant and the return of You're The Worst. i'll watch NXT and CWC on WWE Network at some point tonight.

we had some heavy rain come through here today, which didn't exactly brighten my mood.

i got some great FREE music on NoiseTrade late last night from the very underrated Nicole Atkins. i'll post the links down in the music section.

i've spent most of the day trying to get used to the new Google+. i'm not a fan so far.

check out Janne Karlsson's new blog here: http://nouw.com/svenskapache

i'm so happy i can call this great artist a friend.

hard to believe this damn month is over basically. i know the weather is supposed to be good here for the weekend. i'll believe that when i see it, especially since it's a holiday weekend.

i'll probably be on here early tomorrow, before i have to take mom to the chiropractor.

be well. be creative. be cool. be quick to send me CASH, panties, hate mail, love letters, broken promises and dirty pennies from heaven.

peace and chicken grease...

music:

Nicole Atkins - Live from the Eldon Thacker Show at City Winery Nashville
Nicole Atkins - A Nightmare Before Summer
Nicole Atkins - Dancing in the Dark

"Music is spiritual. The music business is not." - Van Morrison

and your whatever the fuck i wanted you to see video of the day: