a day of pain, of course...

 my life has this uncanny ability to always swing the positive to negative and negative to even more negative with fucking ease. i'm not sure if it is because my inner child has to always be in pain. or, does my ego enjoy the suffering and rising above it. or maybe this is all i really know. happiness is fleeting. pain is real. loss is real. the sad thing is, i really want to be happy. have fun. enjoy what little life i have left. and no matter what i do to try to make sure these fairytales are possible, nothing works. this is why i have such a laid back fuck it view of life, etc. there is no point in me fucking it up more than i already have. i suppose this is my reasoning for just accepting the pain and learning how to live with it. joy.

the Yankees won last night at the Royals, 3-1, to clinch the series. they will play either Detroit or Cleveland in the ALCS.

Big Brother was good last night. Rubina got evicted. Chelsie won the first part of the final HOH. i fully expect Chelsie to win the show on Sunday.

The Old Man was excellent last night.

enjoy some music:

and now some of this and that:

on the DVR tonight will be Big Brother, Smackdown, AEW Rampage and Real Time with Bill Maher. i'll watch NXT Level Up sometime tonight on Peacock.

i might watch some of Game 5 tonight between the Padres and Dodgers.

i will probably be on here in the morning tomorrow.

i am going to try to sleep in my bed tonight. i have been sleeping in my massage chair for a month. i really need to just stretch out and relax and hopefully get some better rest. i'm hoping my bed will do the trick. my left arm has been feeling better recently, so i'm hoping i can sleep in the bed and not have the arm act up again because of arthritis or the pinched nerve. fingers crossed.

i hope everyone has a great weekend.

until tomorrow kids...

fight the power.

fuck racism.

fuck hatred.

fuck war.

fuck the police.

black lives matter.

stay healthy.

wash your fucking hands.

stay off the fucking streets.

get the fucking shot.

Un día de dolor, por supuesto.

be well. be creative. be cool. be quick to send me CASH, panties, hate mail, love letters, broken promises and dirty pennies from heaven.

peace and chicken grease...

music:

The Beaches - Blame Brett (Live)

Four Tet & Ellie Goulding - In My Dreams

Paul Oakenfold & Amba Shepherd - Love Escape

Pretty Lights - Hot Like Sauce

Cassius w/Cat Power - Feel Like Me

"If work was a good thing, the rich would have it all and not let you do it." - Elmore Leonard

and your whatever the fuck i wanted you to see video of the day: